About Us / OriginsThe Compassionate Friends was founded in
Coventry, England, in 1969, following the deaths of two
young boys, Billy Henderson and Kenneth Lawley, the previous
spring. Billy and Kenneth had died just three days apart in
the Coventry and Warwickshire Hospital where Rev. Simon
Stephens was Assistant to the Chaplain. Simon mentioned
Billy's death to Iris and Joe Lawley, and the Lawleys
decided to send flowers to Billy's funeral. The signed the
card simply, "Kenneth's parents," realizing that the
Hendersons would know who they were. Bill and Joan Henderson then invited
the Lawleys over for tea, and an immediate bond was formed
as the two couples spoke freely about their boys, sharing
their memories and the dreams that had died with Billy and
Kenneth. They continued to get together regularly, and young
Rev. Stephens, then only 23, encouraged them to invite other
newly bereaved parents to join them. In 1969, another
grieving mother accepted their invitation to meet with Simon
and the two couples. They decided to organize as a self-help
group and actively begin reaching out to newly bereaved
parents in their community. Because the word "compassionate"
kept coming up, this new organization was called "The
Society of the Compassionate Friends." Simon became a chaplain in the British
Royal Navy in the 70's. He was met by bereaved parents at
ports around the world, and he helped them to develop their
own chapters. TCF had become well-known through U.K. and
U.S.A. editions of such magazines as Time and Good
Housekeeping. Paula and Arnold Shamres of Florida read
Simon's interview in Time Magazine and invited him to visit
them in Florida and speak to bereaved parents there. He did,
and the Shamres subsequently founded the first U.S. chapter
in 1972. Word of the organization spread rapidly through
interest generated by the Phil Donahue Show and the columns
of Dear Abby and Ann Landers. The Compassionate Friends was
incorporated in the United States as a non-profit
organization in 1978. In 1989, The Compassionate Friends of
Great Britain dedicated a plaque commemorating the founding
of the organization, at the Coventry and Warwickshire
Hospital where TCF had begun. The plaque was unveiled by
their patron, Countess Mountbatten, herself a bereaved
parent. Then in November, 1994, Queen Elizabeth
presented Iris Lawley with a medal, The Most Excellent Order
of the British Empire, in recognition of her work on behalf
of TCF. There are now Compassionate Friends chapters in every state in the United States (almost 600 altogether) and hundreds of chapters in Canada, Great Britain and other countries throughout the world. In the United States, chapters are open to all bereaved parents, siblings, grandparents and other family members who are grieving the death of a child of any age, from any cause. |
